tHe sPoRt aDdiCt

after 2 long months of NO posts..

2005-12-26T20:33:00.000-08:00

haha.. at last! my latest post.. nyaha.. a lot of things happened for the past 2 months.. maybe i'll just post here the MAJOR happenings in seton and in my life too.. check it out..

[story of bigsis and lilsis..]
you're probably wondering who is bigsis and lilsis.. here's the story.. for a long period of time, i thought nessie doesn't like me.. on the other side, nessie feels the same way too.. we thought that we stare each other badly.. [maagas daw kasi ako.. but that's my normal way of stare to people..] until one day [that was nov.16], after class, nessie asked bea if i was angry to her.. of course bea asked me about it.. i replied no with a laugh coz why would i be angry to nessie with no apparent reason? then bea went to nessie and told everything..
after i went home, i called bea and talked for a while.. then i suddenly asked her:

vren: bea, bigyan ko kaya ng letter si nessie? para inde na nya ma-misunderstand yung tingin ko sa kanya.. para matapos na lahat.. hehe..

bea: onga! bigyan mo ng letter..

vren: ehh.. nahihiya ako..

bea: anu ka ba! dali na! e di ba matagal mo nang plano yan? gawin mo na..

vren: ocge.. basta agahan mo bukas.. ikaw na magbigay ng letter sa kanya..

next day.. i gave the letter to bea.. then gave it to nessie.. i never expected that right after the assembly.. she greeted and waved at me! [rock on!] from that day on.. we became close.. she ask me if she can call me bigsis.. i totally agreed! then i called her lilsis.. that's the cute and unique story of bigsis and lilsis.. *bow* moral lesson? first impressions don't last.. haha..

[academic week]
whew! aca week was so fun and cool despite those tiring and frustrating moments.. we had math fashion where aika gutierrez and jeriel fajutagana won 2nd place.. our mother seton musical play blew up in the last part because of the stupid sound system in the auditorium but still bagged 3rd place out of 7 sections.. we won first place in english mtv [creative category] and among the top 5 [social category]! woohoo! our reward? a much bonded ddn!

[fieldtrip]
the sad thing about the fieldtrip is the mt. banahaw trip was cancelled because of NPA reasons.. instead, we had the trip on majayjay, laguna.. despite the change of location, it was super fun! we had our moments there.. the main attraction there was the majayjay falls where majority of us bathed in the cold falls! some of us were 'nanginginig'! haha! [aww.. how i miss those times..]

[3rd quarterly exam]
waah! exams were hard! well.. not all.. math and physics is of course hard no matter what.. haha.. oh well.. some of us are so excited in the xmas party and concert, they had a hard time studying! haha..

[xmas party and concert]
aww.. this is our last HS xmas party.. so we gave all that we could to have fun and to be a memorable one.. we had games, exchange gift, and more eating! haha!
the concert was okei.. spongecola and sugarfree performed in the gym.. but it was so hot! damn.. the grade 5 and 6 students were there.. just sitting around.. tsk.. it was fun when pandesal band performed.. [ordertaker! the best!] then sugarfree performed first.. ebe had a little frustration due to technical problems.. then spongecola was the last to perform.. pretty okei.. armo went wild! haha! while they were performing.. i went to dale just to hangout and to be with her for the first and last xmas dance.. [probably..] and.. there's a story to it.. but i'd rather not tell.. maybe its just between me and dale..
one thing on the concert.. student council should have combined the concert and the dance.. majority of those who attended did not have much fun..
another thing.. i got spongecola'a autograph! all of them! on my fave spongebob necktie! woohoo!

[ddn @ atc]
dec. 20 '05.. ddn [but not all of us..] just hangout at atc.. we missed each other! haha.. we ate, played bowling, and had a studio pic! haha! [check out my friendster account if you want to those awesome and wacky pics..]

[fave couple]
haha! who's our fave couple lilsis? nyaha.. we had a good, good conversation with my lil sis about the fave couple thing.. haha.. our messege?:goodluck and best wishes to the both of you! haha! [just between bigsis and lilsis.. to be safe..]

well, well.. another novel.. haha! ciao! post a comment for me! please oh please? thanks! ciao! (^^)

**intrams is getting near!**

aftermath..

2005-11-03T22:38:00.000-08:00

hai.. its been a while.. maybe i need to update this again.. anyway, i have a lot of stories to tell.. haha..

**last october 22, LAPSAA Badminton Competition was held in the DLA gym with 8 or 9 participating schools all over las pinas.. some of which are Divine Light Academy, Augustinian Abbey School, St. Francis of Assisi College System, St. Anthony School, Blessed Trinity School, St. Therese School, and St. Mark's Institute. There were 2 brackets.. good thing we did not have the same brackets with DLA.. it was a clean sweep from singles girls and boys to doubles girls and boys.. in the finals DLA and Seton competed in all divisions.. singles girls was captured by our very own maita bernardo.. runner-ups were singles boys division jeric martinez, doubles girls aizel dalawampu and dale villaceran, and doubles boys ennison ducanes and nikko huelgas. mixed doubles will be after sembreak [no specific date yet].. that's where my division is.. my partner is sid baustista.. hopefully.. hehe.. we all went home happy..

**october 23.. UST exams day.. i did not review on anything or whatsoever because of the whole day competition.. i was so nervous simply because nothing is stuck in my head.. so how did i answered the entrance exam? well.. we [setonians] never expected the test to be that easy.. seriously.. i answered all the questions.. only minimal wise guesses.. we left UST with happy faces because we were confident that we can pass there..

**october 27.. card day.. well.. my grades are good.. except for tle.. 9 points was deducted man! [i wouldn't tell what my grade is..] well.. all my 4 major subjects increased.. especially math! 6 points! thanks to sir iean, my fave subject now is math!

**october 28.. mtv shooting at mina's house.. we had fun.. really enjoyed it.. played a bit of basketball.. [aww.. how i miss playing basketball..] pero kinabukasan..

**october 29.. i got sick.. awfully.. i did not have the guts to get up simply because my body was so weak.. everytime i stand up, my vision went whirling around.. i even experienced black-out.. i did not eat much.. that's why i think i became thin..

**october 30.. bday ni dale.. haha.. wala lang.. happy birthday doodee koh! (^^)

**october 31.. at least now i okei.. but still i can feel the aftermath of my weakness.. i still eat little.. a very abnormal side of me..

**november 3.. yeah! driving lessons! at first i was excited but accompanied with nervous.. but while driving the car, i was whispering to myself, "i can believe it.. i can actually drive!" though at times the engine turns off.. haha.. its normal for beginners.. well.. i can't wait for tomorrow!

well that's it for now.. ciao! (^^)

back again..

2005-10-14T21:46:00.000-07:00

well well well.. its been a long time since my last post here.. a lot of things happened these past few days.. what are these? well.. read on..

*first was the 2nd qtr exams.. it was hard! really! grr..*

*next was the dlsu entrance exam.. ang hirap den! huhu! i hope i will pass that exam.. it will be embarassing if i will not pass.. huhu..*

*the results of my exams! well.. i failed in computer.. but good thing i passed in physics [for the first time!].. haha!*

*we have an upcoming competition on oct. 22! LAPSAA and the other one, according to our coach, is sponsored by san miguel corp. waw! talk about that! this will be my first and last chance.. its now or never!*

*alright! my new car has finally arrived! woohoo! driving lessons, here i go!*

these are the recent events that happened to me.. hmm.. i dont have to say anthing right now.. ciao! (^^)

**yeah! my bday is getting near! oct. 18! (^^)**

spoiled!

2005-10-02T20:11:00.000-07:00

well, well, well.. dad spoiled me these past few days! haha! iba na talaga pag nandito si dad! imagine.. he gave me his brand new laptop [which i'm currently using..], laptop bag, lotsa food! [lays, pringles, ferrero.. yumm!], and a badmin bag worth 2 thou! talk about that.. well.. in the next few weeks, i'll own the car! yeah! [driving lessons, here i go!] once a year naman kasi umuwi si dad eh.. ganyan talaga.. oh well, papa God showered me with soooooo much blessings..

anway, back to emOde.. just read my last post before this.. [emOde.. oct. 1 '05].. i'll be out of the net for a week because of the exams.. ciao! (^^)

emOde..

2005-10-01T23:08:00.000-07:00

hei.. just copied this from my profile in friendster.. just want to describe what am i going through these past few days.. so down and depressed.. wish someone will come running to me and comfort me.. hai.. anyway, here it is..

i'm caught in between two worlds.. don't know where to go, where to run, where to hide from all of this.. wish this is a nightmare.. if this is a nightmare, someone.. please.. wake me up really hard.. before it gets my whole being.. dakara.. this isn't a dream, not even a nightmare.. this is reality.. i'm awake, but the truth is still sleeping.. [emOde]

i'm just like anybody else in this world.. just passing by in this world.. anytime, anywhere, pwede ako kunin ni papa God.. iiwan ko den pala sila.. worst part is, if i went straight to the Paradise, wala pala lahat ng mahal ko dun.. [emOde again]

that's it for now.. hafta go.. exams na! oh no! physics! waaah! hehe.. it's studying time! ciao! (^^)

**oi! lapet na bday ko! oct. 18! woohoo!**

badmin player's prayer

2005-09-25T22:18:00.000-07:00

A BADMINTON PRAYER

By: Henry C. Daut

LORD, bless me as I step into the COURT to play the game of BADMINTON. Allow me to have a good GRIP of the racket I will hold and the game I will play. Guide my every STEP as I move to cover every SHOT. Help me to deliver the best SERVICE to my fellowmen. Be it SHORT, LONG or even just a FLICK of a second. Give me the strength to CLEAR the way to reach greater heights. The power to SMASH all barriers that try to block the way to success. Grant that I may have the courage to RECEIVE the blows that may come my way. Increase my desire to DRIVE forward despite some failures. Let me not DROP my guard and become complacent because of little victories. Instead give me the speed to rush forward to NET greater results and go for the KILL to score. Not just in the game of BADMINTON, but more importantly in the real game of LIFE. Make every victory a reminder of bigger and stronger challenges ahead. Let every defeat become a learning experience that there is more to learn to become better and that I can also savor the joy of winning if I work hard to improve my game. Help me to understand that the person on the other side of the net is not just an opponent that I have to beat but a partner that will bring out my best in the contest. Finally, help me Lord to learn not just the lessons of the game but more importantly, the lessons of life that I may become an excellent badminton player, but more significantly a better person in life. Amen.

::this prayer is cool! i found it in the net. [i forgot the site..] i didn't know that there's also a prayer for badmin players. by the way, this is also dedicated to ESS badmin varsity '06! yeah! rock on guys!::

**ESS shuttle strikers badminton varsity 05-06** [watda name?!?]

::maita bernardo [4th yr.]::
::vren caube [4th yr.]::
::aizel dalawampu [4th yr]::
::nadine torcedo [2nd yr.]::
::dale villaceran [1st yr.]::

::sid bautista [3rd yr.]::
::ennison ducanes [3rd yr.]::
::nikko huelgas [2nd yr.]::
::jharel legaspi [2nd yr.]::
::jeric martinez [1st yr.]::

-=wala lang.. just had the mood to write these names.. ciao! (^^)=-

rainy saturday..

2005-09-25T16:43:00.000-07:00

yesterday was really rainy when the 3 sections of 4th year went to golden acres in quezon city. [that's far men!] well, our GK turned out to be okay, the rain just ruined our clothes. [most of us were wet..] we had fun with the grandmas and granpas there. some of them were friendly, while some preferred to be quiet. i felt a bit sad because they should be on their homes, sitting with their children and grandchildren. But they ended up there. well, that's reality. anyway, we gave them food then had a short program. it's really good because they participated in the said activity. at 12 noon, we said our goodbyes there, some of us were teary-eyed because they felt close to them even for just a short while.

around 1:45 pm we arrived at blue wave to buy some food [we were all hungry!]. after a while, the bus hit the road then we arrived at last in seton.

we practiced our play [for homeroon in tuesday] in front of FBA. [seniors watch out for it!] then i went to the faculty to fetch ms. boots to watch the basketball game between seton and sts [st. therese school] in the gym. sadly, seton lost. that was their decision game whether they will go to semi-finals or not. we were disappointed to them [a bit] coz they made so many errors, most of those were minimal.

hai.. what a day.. and it's monday tomorrow.. another day of cramming for the exam.. ciao! (^^)

cramming time.. [for us seniors!]

2005-09-23T20:05:00.000-07:00

hai.. finally my trangkaso is gone.. but it doesn't mean i can relax or whatever.. we're so full of deadlines! so much pressure.. 4th year life is stressful. a lot of things to do. projects, presentations, yearbook, college entrance exams.. whew! they're really killing us with these deadlines. 2nd quarter exam is getting nearer! [october 5-7] well, my only problem is physics. i like the teacher and the subject, but.. well, physics is really hard. 90% computation 10% analysis. hai.. i hope what i'm doing today is worth it in the end.

anyway, nothing really happened these past few days in school. ccp's over so everything's back to normal. well, dr. suarez said that the ccp performance was superb so she gave the performers a free holiday and outing, same with all the teachers. congratulations to all of us! go seton!

hafta go.. we have gk [gawad kalinga] tomorrow! we're going to quezon city, at home for the aged.. uh-oh.. i hope we'll come out alive.. haha! kidding.. ciao! (^^)

im so sick..

2005-09-20T11:09:00.000-07:00

aww.. i'm so sick today.. trangkaso.. grr.. body pain, cold, cough, fever.. ahh! whatever.. it's tuesday morning. still we don't have any classes [seton]. it will resume tomorrow. *sigh* now what? ohh wait.. dad's coming home! yeah! my mom said he will be coming home by the end of the month! hurray! the sad thing is, he cannot attend our graduation [me and my bro] on march because probably he will have to go back working on the ship on january?!? *groans* i thought HE can attend to one of my important events in my life. i hope he will not come home yet.

anyway, gotta go.. have to rest na.. ciao! (^^)

badminton at lpbc...

2005-09-19T09:50:00.000-07:00

it's monday night.. hai.. good thing we don't have any classes today and tomorrow! [yipee!] so i spent the rest of this day playing badminton and bonding with maita, ate kat, ate avi [am i right? i hope so.. hehe!], dale, ennison, sid and bruce in lpbc [las pinas badminton center].. we really had fun! the atmosphere in the court was very comfortable. the people around were very, very friendly and the court is so cool and affordable too. i met new people including ate kat [friend of maita] and ate avi.. both of them were so excellent in playing badminton! [woohoo! idol!] i had a chance to play with ennison, bruce, mai, ate kat, ate avi and of course, my bestfriend dale. we started around 11:30 am and ended at 6:00 pm. we only paid P70 per person because it was an off peak rate. [now that's affordable!] i hope there will be another. till next time guys! yeah! [gala naman! atc? haha!]

great.. i have another fever again.. it's okei because i was with them.. and i had fun.. i really enjoyed this day.. gotta go! have to rest! ciao! (^^)

one of a kind experience with aika!

2005-09-18T19:11:00.000-07:00

yesterday was so fun and exciting! [right aikee?] hehe! let me start what happened in the morning of september 17 2005...

::2:30 am::
** i woke up so early.. i was thinking about the exam.. "what would it be?", "is it hard?".. these questions went straight to my head. i was a bit worried because some of my alumni friends said that ACET is hard. so i got up and went on to my usual morning routine.

::4:45am::
**yep! its time to go to aikee's house! yeah! mom agreed to bring me to aikee's house. there, me and aika studied i bit for the exam. [actually we ONLY studied MATH because it's the hardest part of the test they say.] after a short while, we went to their family car [a sports car! waw!] then we hit the road. we were accompanied by aikee's ever kind and cool parents!

::6:30am::
**we're at ADMU! [ateneo de manila university] at last! we [me and aika] felt the true blue atenean spirit.. a bit! nyahaha! anyway, we went to the Highschool building and waited for some setonians there. there were a lot of them! yeah! [setonians rock! for now.. nyahaha!] we had a little chit chat with erkki [although most of the time quiet.. or maybe shy?], tin, lara, and princess. we really had so much fun talking about things.

::7:30am::
**at last! we're in the room 16 HS building. oh no.. it's the day! i felt a bit worried... but proud. why? because we, setonians, carry the name of our alma mater. anyway, so much for that. its testing time! wait a minute, why is there an essay?!? aahhh!

::12:50pm::
**we're finished! it wasn't so bad after all. it not that hard as to what my alumni friends said to me. only that we were so time pressured. we cannot stay on one number too long, like for 1 minute. seriously! well, i'm glad we finished the test on time. we'll just have to wait for the results on febuary. that's next year! anyway, me, aika, tin and nathan [tin's bf] walked a long, long way to get to the mrt station. we first ate at subway then after a little walk, we finally arrived in aranata coliseum! we wanted to watch the UAAP cheerdance competition but there were too many people. so we decided to watch a movie at gateway mall. [gateway mall it so cool!] we watched The Crow but tin and nathan decided to watch another movie [maybe because The Craw it a bit brutal.. eww..] so that's when we parted our ways. it also means i'm left with aikee! ["okei vrenie it's you and me against the world" <-- aika. haha!] while watching the movie, we had the same expressions such as "eww.." and "uhh!" because as i said earlier, the movie is brutal and disgusting.

::4:something pm..::
**finally the movie was finished so we decided to go home. aika called her dad to teach us how to commute. we almost cried because we didn't know what to do or where we will go. after a while her dad agreed that we should ride a taxi . the first taxi rejected us. [nyahaha!!] the second one was okei. the driver is very friendly and sometimes tells stories. while in the taxi, we talked and talked many things just to ease our tiredness. our bonding was so much fun! [we wished that moment that if ian could be here with us. now that's super fun!]

::6:05pm::
**at last we arrived at aikee's house. i rested for a while then aikee's mom prepare us a delicious and yummy baked mac and tokwa't baboy! [thanks by the way!] after eating, i said goodbye to them coz i need to go to donna's birthday.

::7:somthing pm::
**i arrived at donna's house! once again i ate.. the food was delicious! then after eating we played cards and drank a little red wine and san mig light. then after more talks, i finally went home..

**yeah! i had i great day! one of a kind experience with aikee! yeah! i hope there's more but this time, with the whole gang/tropa! ciao!

**im using my brand new laptop! cool!

what a week.. whew!

2005-09-16T14:37:00.000-07:00

it's a rainy friday and we don't have any classes today! [yipee!] because of the ccp presentation for tomorrow. same thing goes on on monday and tuesday [if the presntation is really, really good they would include tuesday]. hai.. do i have any story to tell? well.. yes of course.. let's start with..

::monday, sept 12::
**oww.. ddn [our section] hates mondays because of 2 periods english.. we like the subject, but we DON'T like our english teacher.. she doesn't have any sense of humor that's why her class is pretty much boring..

::tuesday, sept 13::
**we don't have any training for badmin varsity.. there were no clubs too because of the upcoming ccp performance.. oww.. i realized that i missed training so much, although it's hard and very tiring.. iba na talaga pag nasa sistema mo na yun.. lagi mo ng hinahanap-hanap.. *sigh* OMG! there's a red spot in my eye! no it's not sore eyes.. it's just that it looked liked it bleeded.. eww.. maybe i got it after p.e class [swimming].. it doesn't hurt actually.. but i got scared after my classmate noticed my eye.. creepy.. well i hope it will be gone in a couple of days..

::wednesday, sept 14::
**my ex talked to me.. that was dismissal.. i got irritated to him because he doesn't go straight to the point.. he told me a lot of things and stuffs and a lot of 'bola' .. grr.. he asked me. "ako ba talaga may kasalanan kung baket tayo naging ganito?" then i replied, "anu ka ba.. dapat alam mo na yan. ilang panahon na ang nakalipas, hindi mo parin alam?!?" i felt insulted when he said that. what does he mean? that i am the reason in all of this? so i said to him "pwede ba, go straight to the point!?!" that's when he told me.. "kahit 1 1/2 years na nakalipas, ikaw parin. i love you." i stayed quiet after he said that not because i was happy to hear that, but i was really annoyed to what he said. then he went home.

**now what? he wants me back after want he did to me!?! come on. i know he wants a second chance, but what he did was something so painful to me. i really had a hard time recovering because of his stupidity. tama bang gawin akong panakip butas!?! which means, nung naging kami his attention was on the other girl! and only now he realized that he loved me all along?!?! what have i done to deserve this?!? he wants me back.. yeah right! get a life!

**dismissal 5:00pm .. i had an argument with my bestfriend dale. well, it's because of a very mababaw reason and misunderstanding. but i kept on understanding her because she's a freshman and still a kid. i was so sad.. i can't stay mad on her. i love her so much as a bestfriend. and i don't want to lose her. i just stayed calm.

**what a day.. one of the worst.. hai..

::thursday, sept 15::
**i went straight to my classroom because it was raining [i wore a cute pooh jacket! hehe!].. and also, i don't want to see dale for a while. in the classroom i saw angela and i talked to her just to forget dale for a while. we went to the c.r but there are too many people [the kikays.. what do you expect..] inside so we head straight to our classroom. but it was cut short because dale and jessa was there. waiting for me. we stare for a while, then i smiled. i said sorry to her. she accepted it and gave me an 'apology' letter. i felt relieved.

**dismissal. i met dale and beanchie again. we kept on walking in the waiting area because of.. [haha!] then my tropa called me because they have something to say to me.. really IMPORTANT. i left dale and beanchie for a while then me, my tropa, and wesley head straight to the chapel. they told me about an 'issue' that was spreading in the freshmen batch. but they did not believed it because they know me and those issue makers don't even know my background. [sore, pathetic losers ehh..] i thanked them so much for being honest and for being TRUE friends!! yeah guys! you rock! then i went back to dale and beanchie.

**8:00pm. i had a conference with beanchie, dale, johnnie and angela. but before that me and johnnie planned to trick dale since she doesn't know johnnie's ym i.d. then we had a conference. it was so much fun at first because of the plan but then dale became annoyed.. nabadtrip.. then she went offline. napikon talaga ako nun.. nagwala ako sa chatroom saying all those nasty words.. pinigilan lang ako nila johnna and angela saying that i should understand her nalang..

**dale texted me, saying that our joke was a good one, but she got annoyed because she said i don't know when to stop. i said to her na i stopped already but she did not believe me. then dale replied "nagkagalit na tayo kahapon. pati ba naman ngayon? what have i done to deserve this?" but we said sorry to each other.. this was the first time we lost our temper. and this is only a trial for us.. a test of our friendship.. and it gets stronger and stronger! and for those issue makers, you're just insecure on both of us! you can never mess up our friendship! right dale? (^^)

**what a week.. hehe! anyway, gotta go now.. ciao! (^^)

**my longest blog ever.. haha!**

moving on...

2005-09-09T22:43:00.000-07:00

hai.. a lot of things and stuffs happened within this week...

first, sept 6.. yep.. we only lasted for 12 days.. and that's it.. *sigh*

sept 7.. depressed.. still thinking about what happened.. then '26' gave me a letter.. explaining why and what is 'his' purpose.. then that night after i went home, i played hale once more.. while lying on my bed, im still thinking and wondering about the incident.. unexpectedly i fell asleep.. i woke up 9:30pm.. then after i got up, i felt something weird.. ang gaan na ng pakiramdam ko.. i have accepted it..

sept 8..we're fine..

sept 9.. i was really happy.. not only '26' said something about me [while watching me doing my CAT routine..], i think we can bring back the 'spark' of our friendship.. yep.. i really hope so.. i'm much more comfortable with '26' now unlike when we were.. *secret* haha! i think we were much closer that we used to be because at that time we limit our actions.. now i know it's really hard to hide something from others.. it's really uncomfortable.. now, we don't have anything to hide from anyone..

if you're reading this, thanks for accepting me.. whether this was trippings or serious.. [well to be honest with you, naging serious ako.. what about you?!? it's okei if you tell me that you were serious or not.. hehe.. just be honest with me.. i'll accept it with all my heart.. nakana! woohoo!] hope you're still the same, even if we are not *blank* anymore.. haha! i will always be the 'vren' you know.. i will never change.. unless for the better.. best buddies paren ha?!? hehe..

"the worst way to miss someone is to be sitting beside them knowing you can't have them.." <-- aww.. this one's for you..

hai.. i should sleep na.. i need some rest.. i should regain my strength, physically, mentally and emotionally.. blow out pala ni catherine tomorrow! yess! festi here we come! wahaha! chow!

here tonight - hale

2005-09-06T23:30:00.000-07:00

here's our song.. hehe.. tamang tama sa situation namen.. haha!

here tonight
hale

so long to you my love
don't be afraid to run away
i know you'll be okay
just take your time to find

*but i need you here tonight
i need you here inside
i need you here tonight
i really, really need you here tonight

made up my mind on this
it too late for me to hold you back
maybe too short or dumb
to try for you but i will anyway

*repeat

its all my fault to feel
this way for you that day
i know that i am and i will
though it's wrong, so wrong

cause i need you here tonight
i need you here inside
i need you here tonight
i really, really need you here

i need you, i need you
i need you here tonight
i need you, i need you
i really, really need you here...

it's over..

2005-09-06T22:57:00.000-07:00

september 6 2005.. one of the painful days of my life.. i know, that one day this will come.. but i never expected that it was sooner.. worst.. it was this day.. i told 'him' that i was ready.. but after 'he' said it, i was so depressed.. sad.. but it's reality.. i have to accept it.. and 'he's' still a kid..

i went home.. then straight to my room.. and cried.. i felt it once more.. after more than a year.. the pain of ending a relationship.. sayang.. masaya na.. but.. then i played here tonight by hale.. and it was the song of the night.. yep.. the lyrics were a match to what i am feeling right now..

now what? im so depressed.. it's a good thing were far from each other.. but i can't help thinking about it.. alam ko, maiilang yun.. pati ako.. impossibleng inde.. especially 'he's' still a kid.. it's hard to bring back the spark of friendship.. it is possible.. but maybe.. it will take long.. that's why im thinking of forgeting 'him' for the mean time.. i dunno.. im so depressed..

'him', 'he' <-- codename.. if you're reading this, you know who you are..

awesome look of my blog..

2005-09-04T23:35:00.000-07:00

well.. since i'm so bored.. maybe i'll just to talked about my jersey and my *new* and updated blog!

as you can see.. here's my badmin jersey.. cool isn't it? well.. sad to say, it is my first and last jersey.. huhu! the good thing is at least i have one and i can play in the competition! [finally..] hehe.. thanks danfort! [sponsor!]

yep.. i'm so addicted to badmin.. i can play for almost 5 hours straight! yeah! but of course now i can't because of my studies.. its okei though.. i have the time playing by means of the badmin varsity.. this year's varsity is cool.. especially the guys.. 5 bunch of boys who are naughty but excellent players! [jharel, jeric, ennison, sid, nikko] of course there are also 5 pretty and also, excellent in badmin. [maita, vren, aizel, nadine, dale] hehe..

about my blog.. it has a new and awesome look! i have my links list.. updates about me.. and the best part it.. there's a shout box! [see below..] yeah! please post on my shoutbox.. or make a comment on one my my blogs.. thanks! anyway.. gotta go! chow!

thanks ryu!

2005-09-04T20:44:00.000-07:00

yep.. i'm back once more.. hehe! because i want to thank a person.. who is it?!? well.. it's ryu uchida! [yeah! i hope you're reading this!] thanks for posting a comment on my blog.. [you were the first one actually.. hehe!] i was surprised when someone made a comment.. unexpectedly, of all the persons i know, it was you.. thank you so much! don't worry.. i found out that you also have a blog.. i'll make a comment on your blog too.. hehe.. ohh.. and i'm so sorry if this was a late 'thank you'.. i haven't checked my blog for months! [the last time was around april i guess?!?] hehe..

anyway, today is a sunday evening.. which means.. tomorrow is monday! *groans* school time again.. i have to deal again with the same people.. same place.. and same problems.. being a 4th year student in ess is quite a tough life.. so much pressure.. yet it is still fun.. hai.. anyway, got to sleep.. chow!

*hey hey hey! my birthday is getting near! [oct. 18] hehe!*

yeah!

2005-09-04T18:32:00.000-07:00

ei! i haven't posted a blog here for a long, long time.. [because of my lazyness and my other blog, friendster blogs..] so i decided to update it.. how poor my blog is.. hehe.. kidding! well.. what's going on my life right now? a lot of things have happened.. recent foundation week, met a lot of friends, palarong pinoy, exams, card day [huhu! i got a low grade on physics.. though i like the subject now...] conflicts between friends and a whole lot more.. hai.. 4th year life is really difficult.. a lot of work to do.. like assignments [tons!], projects, thesis, and college applications.. then there's more of it like problems with friends and family.. uhh! and some little problems gets bigger.. so much pressure.. now i don't have a regular sleep, eating habits and the like.. and im starting to get thin.. great.. now what.. oh well.. that's it..

not another dull day...

2005-04-19T23:30:00.000-07:00

ei.. got nothing to do here... again... [umm... how many times i've said this line???] im thinking again of what happened last week... the worst had come upon me... i cant tell it.. its just a *huge* secret for us friends [street]... but its finished.. i cant change the past right... but all those things that they said to me really bothered me... i've been asking myself, "what happened to me?", "why am i like this?", "it's not the vren me..."... all those things kept circling on my head... and sometimes, i want to bang my head on the wall for doing all those things... i know i have to change.. and i will... i dunno.. maybe i was over---... argh! i should keep this line in my head, "yesterday is gone"...

anyway, about other things, i'm almost done playing golden sun 2 on my gameboy! i'm addicted to it lately... because of that, mom scolds me often.. hehe! don't worry.. a little bit more and im done! i hope there's another sequel to it...

ahh yes.. badminton.. about that, dad called here and said if i'm already taking badminton lessons.. and i said to him that im not coz mom wont let me.. my grades went low... but dad just reminded me of my grade.. you know.. i should make up this 4th year so i can go to a good school... he also asked me if i would still join the varsity next school year.. yeah i said... which means, he agrees on me taking the lessons! [how kind of you dad.. thanks! you're the best!] the question is... when? so i can do something worthwhile...

"what awaits me for tomorrow?" <--- my usual thing to say this summer... i dunno.. maybe im so bored of doing the same things everyday...

anyway, got to sleep... sayonara! il enjoy sleeping with my bed and pillows now [like what ms. boots said to me..] ZzzzZ...

wallclimb tripp...

2005-04-15T22:40:00.000-07:00

heyya! im kinda tired.. but i can still type here... this night was absolutely great! me, mac, ms.boots and ms. may went wall climbing! the bonding was so much fun! me and mac went to SM earlier than them... we quite panicked! we thought they were gone or something.. and i didnt have my cellphone at that time! good thing i had i fonecard and called ms. boots on her cell... we [me and mac] planned to hide from them.. *shhh!* hahah! but we were excited, so we didnt push through to our *naughty* plan... i was teasing ms. boots a lot.. you know.. for being an *expert*... haha! and me and ms. may were talking about a lot of things... still.. we really had fun... despite that mac didnt finished wall climbing.. [he was... a *bit* afraid at that time coz it's his first time...] and i had an achivement for this night! i have climbed the difficult one! and the best one ever yet! if you look at it first, it's difficult to climb it.. but im the kid who loves challenges.. so i go for it... and achieved it! it was a great experience, that i want to go for it again! im really looking forward to do it again.. but this time, a little different.. maybe badminton??? yeah! that would be great! i hope it will come sooner!

::to ms. boots... ahh! you're really good! keep it up! expert! haha!

::to ms. may.. hey! we made it! we climb the difficult one! congrats to both of us!

::to mac.. hey dude! try again... this time complete it! don't be afraid! hehe....

anyway.. got nothing to do here.. gameboy na nga lang....

mmm...

2005-04-08T01:20:00.000-07:00

its friday dawn... still not sleepy... and tomorrow i'll be gone.. we're going to pangasinan just to relax and enjoy.. probably go swimming and bar and karaoke... just to stay away from city life for now... next day we'll go to manaoag to attend a mass... i'll be back at sunday night... i dunno... its exciting, coz at last im gonna relax... and its not exciting coz im gonna leave my barkada for 2 days... i hope they will miss me... *sigh..* anyway, just finished playing golden sun on my gameboy advance... but i haven't finished the whole game yet... my eyes get tired easily so i can't play for long hours... but i am enjoying it.. it is one of the best rpg game i've ever played on GBA... these past few days many events occur... like when mom bought me birkenstock sandals worth Php 3,000! talk about that... me and my sis had a heart to heart talk... and our barkada are getting close... that's good... uhh.. i think i better sleep so i won't get sick again... i had a fever last wednesday... a slight fever yesterday and.. i dunno now.. i hope i'll get well soon... anyway, adios! oh yeah, please pray for our beloved pope john paul II's soul... today is his burial....

oopss...

2005-04-07T22:30:00.000-07:00

uhh.. sorry i haven't been visiting my blog for the past few days... even if i do, i won't write anything here.. why? coz i can't think of something... you know.. bored all the time at home... sitting at the couch either watching tv, playing gameboy or doing nothing... just plain sleeping... eat... surf the net.. wash the dishes.. or hang out with my friends at night... and the cycle goes on... argh! so why do i have to write here if i will keep on repeating what i do every single day? tsk tsk... anyway, these past few days made me frustrated... first, me and ms. boots can't set a date to go wall climbing... it's either we're busy or one of us has an appointment on something... "nahihiya tuloy ako sa kanya..." *sigh..* lastly, my mom keeps on scolding me and my sister about our friends at our street... we think she's too paranoid... mom keeps on telling us to stay away from guys... and she's saying that she heard from one of our neighbors some gossips about us [our group of friends in our street, which is composed of 5 gals and 2 guys]... on my part, "ito na nga lang ang pwede kong gawin na nagpapasaya sa akin, bakit ayaw pa ni mama? hindi na nga natuloy yung badminton class at driving lesson ko, ngayon ayaw pa nyang makisama ako sa barkada ko.." i mean, i do the chores from morning till afternoon... after that, around 6pm, i hang around with my friends outside... "and unfair naman... gumagawa naman kami ng chores mula umaga hanggang hapon, bakit di pa nya mapagbigyan yung pakikipaghang-out ko sa barkada ko?" mom also keeps on telling me na wala akong mapapala sa pakikipagbarkada ko.. maybe yes.. but look at the other side... friends help you a lot besides parents... and you also know what's happenings around this time of teenagers... so when you go to college, you know what to do or not to do... sometimes i think, "anong gusto ni mama? tulad ng mga anak ni tito rolly? kung alam lang ni mama.. oo nga.. hindi nga sila lumalabas... pero nasaan yung freedom nila? lalo na yung panganay? wala siyang kaalam alam sa environment nya... pwedeng pagdating nya sa college, sa sobrang curious nya, magawa nya yung mga bagay na mali... o kaya maging rebelde sya..." i also understand mom's side of protecting me... but i also want to say to her "na sana maintindihan nya ang pinagdadaanan ko sa teenage years ko... lalo na sobrang laki nung gap namin sa isa't isa..." that's all... but i can't say that to her... i'm still afraid... i dunno.. i think there's no chance mom will understand my situation right now.. all she wants is to have her own way.. she doesn't want to listen to my own side... tsk tsk...

marawi!

2005-04-03T17:20:00.000-07:00

oist! i've been thinking lately... i cant believe i miss school... not because of books, lectures. assignments and projects... it's because of our teachers, classmates and friends... for me, this junior year was so much fun... unlike my first and second years... this one was the best yet so far... marawi became bonded so much, i had a good time with school even if there are a lot of cramming and stuff to do, and i was closer to some of my teachers.... i never thought third year was gonna be this good... oh well... i just wanna say miss yah all to:

::my dearest teachers::

::and to marawi batch 04-05::

sigh

2005-04-01T12:32:00.000-08:00

i can't believe it... i got 76 on chem.. and 79 on math! argh! how could this be? [cry] ahh.. never mind... it's done already.. well i do have consequences... i probably wont take up badminton clinic, my dad probably won't buy me yonex badminton racket, my mom won't enroll me to a driving school, and... i dont have anything to do this freakin' summer! i'm gonna stay here in my house... sitting around... uhh! i'm not gonna do any worthwhile stuff this summer... except for my diliman access review... but still, it not fun!! its like my past summers... i'm gonna hate again this summer!!! uhh! tsk tsk! maybe just play my game boy advance, hang out with my friends on our street, eat, sleep, watch tv, surf the net, text ms. boots [who is only my textmate] and... i dunno the others yet... argh! i wish someone would save me from all of this... like the song klsp by spongecola... take a look at the first two lines of the lyrics...

*Sino ‘tong nakatingin?
Anghel bang magliligtas sa’kin?*

haaay... what now...? i'm so bored... uhh.. anyway, see yah later!

biglaan...

2005-03-30T00:00:00.000-08:00

Biglaan
6 cycle mind

Nandito nakaukit pa rin sa puso ko,
Nang sabihin mong wag na lang.
Nandito nakatatak pa rin sa isip ko,
Kung paano mong kinalimutan ang lahat.

Kay bilis ba't umalis,
nakakamiss
Na bigla lang

di ko man lamang nalaman
Na mawawala,
Na bigla lang
di mo man lamang naisip
Na idahan-dahan.
Hindi ako sanay sa biglaan,
Unti unti na lang sanang nawala.

Hindi ba natin kayang magkunwari,
at sabihing sige na lang
Hindi ba natin kayang dayain,
Ang mga yakap sa tuwing lumalambing

Kay bilis ba't umalis,
nakakamiss
Na bigla lang

di ko man lamang nalaman
Na mawawala,
Na bigla lang
di mo man lamang naisip
Na idahan-dahan.
Hindi ako sanay sa biglaan,
Unti unti na lang sanang nawala.

*yeah! before i sleep, i wanna share you guys this song... i really like this one.. probably coz i can relate to it... enjoy! adios! sleep tight but don't let the bug bites! haha! nytz! ^_^*

mems...

2005-03-29T23:46:00.000-08:00

ei! im back again... i just remembered... febuary 26... the day when me and katrice became friends again... for the third time... and today is march 29... 1 month and 3 days, i think... and i thought i lost her... for good! she was one of my WORST fears! honestly! i thought there was no chance of getting reconciled with her again... you know, i cried for some days... thought of her... maybe you're saying that it's quite easy forgetting someone, well... you're wrong! why? coz we're on the same class! how can i forget her? we are just tables and chairs apart... that incident really bothered me for about a month or more... and people noticed that i've changed... i became quiet, kinda lonely, always thinking of something or someone, my ym status is always about her and a whole lot more... i almost gave up... coz i was telling my friends that i'm ready to move on... until that one fateful night in ym... i was talking to arianne about katrice when suddenly, she went online! i was shocked! i didn't know what to do... at first, i dont want to private messege her coz i'm not yet ready... so i went asking my online friends for advice... and one of them (it was johnnie actually) said that i should talk to her or lose her totally... i dont wanna lose her coz she became one of my worst fears... so there.. i talked to her... fortunately, she was in the mood... and there! i was saying sorry to her... and she gladly accepted it, which made me relieved... life really is unpredictable... you'll never know what's waiting for you tomorrow... a lot of them are full of surprises!!! and i still cannot forget that event... it made my heart jumping around, celebrating! this is one of my happiest moments in my life... although it is not the same as before, i'm still happy about it...

*to katrice, johnnie, and all you people out there, hope you're reading this!*

bored kid...

2005-03-29T12:54:00.000-08:00

hey there... it's 12:30 pm on my clock... nothing to do... which means im sooo bored! uhh... i just *stole* the password of this internet card... it's from my sister's... haha! im so bad! i can't help it! yesterday she does not want me to go surfing the net... so i did something *evil*... and this is it! anyway, damn it's hot in here! even if the electric fan is already at number 3, damn im sweating.. a lot! argh! and i can't turn on the aircon coz the electricity is expensive... tsk tsk! what am i gonna do? probably work on some pictures here... im still working on putting some pictures of mine here... uhh.. not much people on ym... i thought there will be a lot of them coz it's vacation! some people... im really excited about the badminton clinic... my mom and dad is in favor of it, so i dont have any problem about that... i just want to enhance more of my skills coz im a varsitarian at ess (school)... ohh... and my mom wants me to go to a driving school... interesting although im a BIT nervous... of course i might crash the car! or something might happen to me... anyway, that's not yet now... and im sleepy again... i love taking a nap... i dunno why... when i was i kid, i never wanted to take a nap... i just want to play outside with my friends... but now, its the other way around... probably because i do a lot of things.. and sometimes take regular sleeps... you know, you should take 7 or 8 hours of sleep... but as for me, well, probably 4 or 5 hours of sleep... and that's not normal.... *sigh* oh yeah! my dad bought me golden sun 2: lost age cartrige for game boy advance... you know im a bit addicted to consoles, games and stuff like that... and i haven't played yet! my sister and brother plays it now... probably, when they finish the game, i may able to play it, and SOLO!! hahaha! anyway, got to go... or else my sis would catch me using her net card... adios!!!

yeah!

2005-03-29T03:08:00.000-08:00

uhh... it's 3:00 am in my clock... and i am still not sleeping!!! it's because from 12am to 7am the internet is free to use in my prepaid card... argh! anyway, i just got it from my new scientific calculator... im a newbie here... and im having problems uploading photos here.. i dunno why they need picasa just to install your photos... badtrip... im so bored... and sleepy but fighting it off just to type here... i wonder what my final grade looks like? hope it's okei coz it worries me.. a lot! when will i enroll to summer badminton clinic? im so excited about that so that i can do something worthwhile this summer vacation... ohh, by the way, i found this blog site because of *toot!* hehe! he's my former crush! and he's a cutie! ahh.. i simply love chinito guys... he's smart and kinda loves anime too, like me... well, i won't give anymore info's about him... he *might* know that it's him.. you know what i mean... uhh.. i think i'd better sleep... and i hope tomorrow, something good awaits me... zzzzzzZZZzzzzz.....